wandering thoughts

Well, look who's into blogging again! Welcome back?

This was actually kind of unexpected cause all along, I thought I was OK, but then something happened... And somehow, I feel that no matter how much I tell my friends how I feel, we would never be on the same page, simply because they haven't been in the same situation as I have.

For a couple of days now, I have been in a train wreck of emotions. I talked less. I socialized less. I preferred being alone most of the time. With that, I am left alone with my dangerous, assuming, wandering thoughts. And earlier today at church, for the first time ever, I broke down. Literally. From the moment the mass started until it finished, I was crying. I was with my clueless family, and then halfway through the mass, my mom asked me, "Are you wearing your contact lens?" Getting teary eyed is normal when I'm on my contacts, so maybe she thought it was about it. I said yes, but then maybe she knew it wasn't just about it. Well, of course she knew something was definitely up. The moment she asked me why I was crying... Hello, Niagara falls! I couldn't hold my emotions anymore and no matter how hard I try to stop myself from sobbing, I just couldn't. It went on for a good five minutes, and the rest was history. But in case you want to know,  I cried outside the restaurant and in a cubicle in the restaurant's restroom. But I managed to get myself together, so...

My thoughts are clouding up like a tornado in my head right now, and I can't wait to vent them all out here.